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happy bday to me

i’ve been wanting to talk about the creative process of my debut album, because it’s been the most confusing, painful and healing chapter of my life. when i started writing it, i thought i knew exactly what the story would be. it was supposed to be an album about someone who broke me in a way i still can’t fully explain.

he disappeared without a goodbye. i spent months trying to understand what i did wrong, rereading old messages, searching for closure that never came. and then, years later, he came back. out of nowhere. apologizing, asking if i was “okay” with what happened, as if the emptiness he left behind didn’t rewrite the whole map of who i became. as if a late apology could stitch up wounds he never bothered to look at.

the songs came naturally. every track turned into a snapshot of the journey: the heartbreak, the confusion, the nights i cried until morning, the mornings i smiled like nothing was wrong. i had planned an entire era with four singles, a big cinematic universe built around my pain, like turning suffering into spectacle would make it feel less heavy.

but somewhere along the way, while writing about him, i met someone new. someone who didn’t hurt, didn’t disappear, didn’t make me doubt my worth. and suddenly the story shifted. i didn’t want to live inside those shadows anymore. one single felt enough, a soft closure instead of a dramatic explosion.

the rest of the album became a home for the version of me who waited for answers that never came. the version of me who learned she deserved more. the version of me who realized that identity isn’t shaped by who leaves, but by who we choose to become after.

that’s why i named it “i’m peaches.” because in the middle of all that pain, i found myself. the real me. the one who survived the silence and turned it into music.

out dec, 23

xx, peaches