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cycle of life

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I feel like a lonely king in the middle of a crowd. Touring, drifting from city to city. The other day, we missed a concert. I still can't get used to the time differences. I'm embracing the simplicity of an ordinary life. With no one in my life, I'm facing solitude like a king left alone, savoring the quiet.

Lately, I've taken an interest in self-discovery sports surfing, to be exact. I've always had a dream of doing a Hang Ten in every city. But every time I stand on the board, I regret it. It feels like you're waiting for someone to join you, like an unspoken expectation. Still, we push through, we grow, we make bad choices. We make mistakes, we leave, we return, we die, we love and we don’t. It’s an endless cycle, isn’t it? Like fragments of light spinning around us.

That’s exactly why I can’t make sense of anything. It’s like I’ve shed the parts of myself that awakened my darker side. I feel like chaos, even in music there’s no harmony. Everyone is obsessed with adapting to everything, while the outliers are cast away, the books rewritten, their pages left blank. No matter what anyone does, nothing can take us back to the past. And if the future turns out worse than the past, the only thing left is to conform to the robotic cycle of life. You follow a predetermined path, do nothing else, stay in the loop. Don’t overthink. Just exist empty, purposeless, like everyone else.

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