M. Bastard

M. is 33 years old. She is the Lead Singer of The Petting Zoo. M. is also known as "Accordionista". M. is located in London at The Korean Cafe.

M. likes to exercise at the gym during off hours and is trying to improve skill in order to get ahead professionally.

*keels over in shock*

The songs of M.

Playing good songs on stage is crucial to the career of any musician. Although it's possible to play covers of other people's material, the best way to gain serious fame and become a superstar is to play your own songs. You can work on up to three songs at a time.

Known Songs Popularity Composed
If It Pleases The Crowd 360 1891527/30/2024
Dorsal Light Response 700 1888747/18/2024
European Cuisine 780 1845231/19/2024
Missing The Little Green Man 735 18241110/23/2023
Clothing Misunderstander 490 18227410/17/2023
Pesky Kids 500 1814389/12/2023
i put on my robe and wizard hat 250 1805908/8/2023
Jiggle Physics 500 1801297/20/2023
Numbers make my head hurt 425 1787995/25/2023
Snitches get stitches 310 1787125/22/2023
Spitting on you; be grateful 500 1774283/29/2023
reinvention 500 1770923/15/2023
Poporazzi 500 1716037/30/2022
Sugar Drips 500 1689864/12/2022
Writing my own damn song for once 500 1688224/5/2022
Putting the con in conjugal 500 1681883/9/2022
Young! Young! I'm Ever So Young! 500 1600854/6/2021
Shouldn't a lackey do this for me? 500 1546848/24/2020
How Old??? 500 14881712/23/2019
Hypocrisy Is A Helluva Drug 500 1439756/4/2019
whatevs 500 1417563/4/2019
We're running out of songs, Kobedammit 500 13813710/4/2018
Psychic Cheese 500 1380029/29/2018
I have some questions 500 1352556/6/2018
Soulstice 500 13146512/30/2017
Goodbyes 500 13116212/18/2017
Friday 500 12986010/24/2017
All Hail Me 500 12974110/19/2017
Singy Singy Song Song 500 1284768/28/2017
YeYe 500 1278227/31/2017
Peeps Be Cray-Cray 500 1259225/13/2017
So moreish 500 1245873/19/2017
Arsedness Level Minimal 285 1244553/13/2017
The East Wind 500 1235762/5/2017
Ellipses are the devil's work 500 1230941/15/2017
The Lonely Birthday Cake 500 1228011/3/2017
Elegance is my Middle Name 500 12231812/14/2016
The Trouble with Tribbles 500 12217912/8/2016
I should probably write a song now 500 12163311/16/2016
Ladeda 500 12112110/25/2016
The sitting around in London song 500 1191248/3/2016
#WakeUpSheeple 500 1177656/7/2016
Simulacra 500 1175945/31/2016
My Mediocre Music bores the World 500 1173145/20/2016
Modern Contemporary 500 1167414/26/2016
Repertoire Arse-kicker 500 1163404/9/2016
Giddy-up pony, and get your hay 500 1153202/27/2016
Oh the Drama! (Feat. The Mad Cellist) 500 1152052/22/2016
The Cuddly Snowman 500 1140341/4/2016
Aurora Borealis 500 11371712/22/2015
Civility Is An Artform 500 11341212/9/2015
Chenille Mop My Tears 500 11276011/12/2015
Argh, I'm running out of songs 500 11266111/8/2015
Big Pimpin' Phil Style 500 11241510/28/2015
Noli me tangere 500 1105018/10/2015
An Ode to Ginger, aka Stop Screaming Now 500 1094616/27/2015
1 <3 Whisky 500 1090236/9/2015
Mechanical Bull 500 1078564/22/2015
Gremlin on the Wing 500 1072053/25/2015
A Song About How Great Phil Is 500 1066403/2/2015
Budapissed 500 1064052/20/2015
The Garden Gnome and the Disco Ball 500 1058521/28/2015
So Special 500 1057181/22/2015
Golden Barred Goddess 500 10492612/20/2014
Smarf Shall Save the Universe 500 10395811/10/2014
The Most Beautiful Bum in the World 500 10355510/24/2014
Transformative 500 1021838/28/2014
Devant: 3eme mouvement 500 1019148/17/2014
Devant: 2eme mouvement 500 1008897/5/2014
Devant: 1er mouvement 500 1003806/14/2014
Avant: 3eme mouvement 500 1001796/6/2014
Avant: 2eme mouvement 500 1001796/6/2014
Avant: 1er mouvement 500 1001796/6/2014
Shasu of Yhw 500 994075/4/2014
The Valley of the Thracian Rulers 500 977922/26/2014
Etemenanki 500 977922/26/2014
The Dark Lords of Hattusha 500 9580112/5/2013
Aetolian League 500 9580112/5/2013
The Attalids of Pergamon 500 9504911/4/2013
Companions of the Rass 500 9504911/4/2013
Meshwesh and the Sea Peoples 500 9448310/11/2013
Serbonian Bog 500 940099/22/2013
Beastie 500 939039/17/2013
Nemeses 500 938019/13/2013
Who's Who? 500 936069/5/2013
Banana Mañana 500 927187/30/2013
Generic Songtitle 500 918346/23/2013
The Room in the Elephant 500 913986/5/2013
The Island of the Creepy Dolls 500 912565/30/2013
Another song, well I neverer! 500 8615610/29/2012
A song, well I never! 500 8556810/5/2012
Terribly Clever Classical Music Pun 500 848539/5/2012
What Doesn't Kill You 500 842368/10/2012
The Classics are the Best 500 841408/6/2012
Bugger Off Chelsea 500 823965/26/2012
Goings On 500 822465/19/2012
Posturing Pustules 500 821525/16/2012
Follow That Guide! 500 821525/16/2012
In With the Out Crowd 500 817434/28/2012
Desperate Poaching Affray 500 815514/20/2012
Killer on the Lam 500 810043/29/2012
Diddlydiddlydebedobedoo 500 804273/5/2012
Foiled Again! (Nikita's Song) 500 791911/13/2012
I found this Higgs Boson down the back of the sofa 500 789611/4/2012
Oi'll Give It Foive 500 7844212/13/2011
French Spies Wear Berets 500 7743911/1/2011
Rhythm of the HOOONNNKKK! 500 7724610/24/2011
Cor Blimey, Guv'nor! 500 765979/27/2011
Life's Mediocre Pageant 500 764669/22/2011
Sofa Factory 500 759318/30/2011
KTC Pure Butter Ghee 500 756948/20/2011
Golly Gosh and Botheration 500 754598/11/2011
Lunch at Cartier 500 752638/2/2011
Eating the Animals in the Zoo 500 729304/27/2011
The Fundaments 500 728164/23/2011
Ooh la la 500 725324/11/2011
Time Winds 500 722924/1/2011
Maggie the Cat 500 722213/29/2011
The Heat Death of the Universe 500 719343/17/2011
Bazoom 500 717303/8/2011
Euphemia did the Can-Can 500 715693/2/2011
The Best Song Ever Written 500 713912/22/2011
Day of Rage 500 710502/8/2011
Phone Numbers Of The Dead 500 709272/3/2011
Scenes of Devastation and Distress 500 6968512/13/2010
Don't Call Me Shirley 500 6964312/11/2010
Oh hey, it's another song. What were the chances? 500 6925311/25/2010
Neu! Reloaded 500 6909411/18/2010
Enter The Neu! 500 6896811/13/2010
Attack of the Killer Neu! 500 6882411/7/2010
Revenge of the Neu! 500 6867911/1/2010
Neu! III: this time it's personal 500 6854910/27/2010
Even Neu!er! 500 6840410/21/2010
Neu! 500 6828610/16/2010
Eternity 500 6801010/4/2010
Aubergine 500 678399/27/2010
They Shoot Does, Don't They? 500 674269/10/2010
O Camisole Mio 500 669868/23/2010
The Day The Puns Ran Out 500 666678/9/2010
Adagio for G-Strings 500 664988/2/2010
Bracarole 500 663137/26/2010
Madame Buttonfly 500 661537/19/2010
Turandrawers 500 660337/14/2010
Rhapsody in Bloomers 500 658697/7/2010
O Fortunbra 500 657617/3/2010
La Forza del Décolletage 500 654666/20/2010
The Babydoll of Seville 500 653416/15/2010
The Nutscracker Suite 500 652356/11/2010
Air on a Granny Knicker 500 651156/6/2010
lalala 500 650106/1/2010
Byzantium 500 631173/14/2010
A Girl and a Gun 500 629723/8/2010
Goulash is tasty 500 617461/16/2010
Pigalle 500 614601/4/2010
24/7/56 500 6076112/6/2009
On the Many Exciting Uses of an Accordion 500 582818/25/2009
A Bright Spark 500 580578/16/2009
The Spectacle of the Society 500 575837/27/2009
Airs and the Graces 500 570427/4/2009
Moderne 500 566276/17/2009
Symphony of Doom 500 562075/30/2009
The Virtues 500 560765/25/2009
Opera Schmopera 500 557875/13/2009
If You Want To Speak Out, Speak Out 500 551424/16/2009
Suki's Cookies 500 548924/6/2009
A Frozen Lakeside Is No Place For My Friends 500 542783/11/2009
The Melbourne Method 500 539842/27/2009
Orvallian Nightmare 500 534302/4/2009
The Heroine Pines For Her Lost Love 500 531391/23/2009
The Satisfying Dénouement 500 528421/10/2009
The One People Will Whistle On The Way Home 500 5260112/31/2008
The Fat Lady Is Singing, Time To Go Home 500 5212212/11/2008
Oh Look! A Chorus Appeared From Nowhere! 500 5191212/3/2008
My twin has fallen for my cross-dressing disguise 500 5176111/26/2008
The Midget In My Bag Is My Long Lost Gypsy Child 500 5158711/19/2008
Finit 500 5042310/1/2008
The Gay Arthropod 500 498289/7/2008
Celebrity Minge 500 496308/29/2008
Griefer Fangirl 500 494658/23/2008
Kynodesme 500 485807/17/2008
[Insert Proper Song Title Here] 500 482567/3/2008
Poporoos = Tour = Beer 500 481056/27/2008
Beard or Merkin? 500 476266/7/2008
You Just Put Your Lips Together 500 473005/24/2008
The Ointment In Your Fly 500 470835/15/2008
Bicycle Xylophone Cupcake 500 463404/14/2008
O! Banjolina! 500 461964/8/2008
I'd love to write a title but I'm all out of ideas 500 459543/29/2008
It's A Bit Stormy Out 500 458483/25/2008
There Will Be No Hallelujahs 500 458473/25/2008
Vicki Sees Dead People 500 445742/1/2008
A Song for Melboonia 500 441381/14/2008
Otis Crawford is a Loon 500 441381/14/2008
This is a Random Song Title 500 4339412/14/2007
When Repertoires Go Bad 500 4324012/7/2007
Bound to Please 500 4308112/1/2007
My pink oboe's bigger than your pink oboe 500 4293511/24/2007
Hang 'em, flog 'em, string 'em up 500 4266611/13/2007
When a Zombie Meets a Shotgun 500 4245011/4/2007
Everyone Loves Those Cute Little Kitties 500 4224210/27/2007
Spectacular Accordions 500 4192810/14/2007
The Lady is a Judge 500 415519/28/2007
Absinthe Makes the Heart Grow Fonder 500 412259/14/2007
The Days Are Just Packed 500 407228/24/2007
Fuck off, Al Jolson 500 403688/10/2007
I knew Garbo before she wanted to be alone 500 399537/23/2007
Chaney After Midnight 500 394267/1/2007
I'm ready for my close-up, Mr DeMille 500 392586/24/2007
Clara's Got Wings (or How an It Girl Came Undone) 500 390636/16/2007
Naked On Her Goat 500 389256/10/2007
The Day They Buried Rudy 500 385435/25/2007
Trapped on a ice-floe with Lillian 500 382735/14/2007
Buster vs the Blinking Buzzards 500 379615/1/2007
Teaserama 500 376084/17/2007
Zen and the Art of Accordion Maintenance 500 374374/9/2007
The Vagabond Legionnaire Chimbley Sweep's Ballad 500 368173/15/2007
Lyrics Schmyrics 500 357641/30/2007
The Dear Green Place 500 352831/10/2007
On The Road 500 3455812/10/2006
Tapestry on the Wall 500 3433512/1/2006
Gangazumba (Burst the Bubble) 500 3400611/17/2006
Making Up The Numbers 500 3374711/7/2006
Who Knew? 500 3374211/6/2006
Polish Goo 500 3365211/3/2006
My summer of falling over 500 3359710/31/2006
Vegetarians or Lampshades? 500 3309710/11/2006
Excerpt 500 3292610/3/2006
(You Don't Want To Know) Do You? 500 327089/24/2006